Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Doctor Day

Recently, I had the opportunity to teach my younger daughter’s preschool class about being a doctor. Sometimes I think that part of the reason I became a doctor was just so I could get to do that.

I was nervous. I’m not sure why I was quite so nervous, considering in retrospect, I can’t honestly think of anything that could have gone wrong. It wasn’t like I was lecturing to a bunch of Harvard professors--these are individuals who pick their noses and eat it. In public. This was like the least discerning audience of all time.

I started out by introducing myself and asking the kids, “Do you know what a doctor is?”

One kid’s hand shot up and I called on him. “A doctor gives us s-----,” he announced.

I couldn’t make out the last word he said, so I took a guess. “A doctor gives you socks?”

The kids burst into hysterical laughter. He said “shots.” How did I not know that? That is literally the only thing children know about doctors.

I had this brilliant idea to bring in a pile of rubber gloves for the kids, so they could each put on a glove and feel like a doctor. Except this turned out to be the worst idea of all time. Kids are apparently unable to put on gloves on their own. Several teachers had to be recruited to help. This ate up, like, ten minutes.

After that, I had the kids listen to each other’s chests with my stethoscope. They came up in pairs of two so I could help them. Except about a quarter of the class was completely deaf.

Child: “I can’t hear anything!”

Me: [adjusts stethoscope] “How about now?”

Child: “No! Nothing!”

Me: [able to literally feel small child’s heart pounding with my hand on the diaphragm of the stethoscope] “Um… sorry?”

Then I broke out my reflex hammer. You want to hear something sad? I actually bought a new reflex hammer just to use in my daughter’s class. The fact that I was using it on patients wasn’t motivation enough, apparently.

The teachers looked a little nervous about that hammer. Understandably so. It was fine though. Nobody was beaten senselessly with the hammer or anything like that.

Soon after, we ran out of time, which was a shame because I was just getting into it. The teacher asked the children, “Do you have any questions for the doctor that aren’t stories?”

A boy raised his hand: “I went to the doctor and I got a shot.”

“Questions that aren’t stories,” the teacher clarified.

A girl raised her hand: “My mom took me to the doctor and I got a shot.”

And it just sort of went on like that.

In any case, it was a really fun experience. Highly recommended.

10 comments:

  1. This is awesome! My favorite and scariest thing I've ever done as a doctor was dissect cow eyeballs with a group of elementary school children. I need to do that again, it's been a while. You brought me right back in that classroom. Thanks Fizzy:)

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    1. Yikes! I'll skip that :)

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    2. Lol I didn't get the doctor shot question they were too enamored with the eyeballs. I don't even think they got that I was a doctor. I did get one kid so queasy that he had to leave the room and peek in at his own discretion.

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  2. Hahaha this was a great post. I hope to do something like this w/ my daughter's class someday; I'll remember your tips!!

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  3. HI Fizzy! Great post! You really are an amazing writer and described it so perfectly.
    I did this for my daughter's nursery (3-4) class this year. It was probably the highlight of my year (MS3...). For those out there looking to do this here are some ideas I used (in addition to stethoscope listening) that went over really well:
    1) blew bubbles to show how far germs go when you sneeze
    2) we put cinnamon (a little bit) on their hands so they saw how they could get so dirty and needed soap to wash it off and 2 seconds in water doesn't get germs off.
    3) i then showed them how to wash their hands while singing a song: (to tune of row your boat)
    Wash, wash, wash your hands
    wash them till their clean
    wash the bottoms and the tops
    and fingers in between.

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  4. So well said. I had a pretty similar experience with my daughter's preschool! I started laughing out loud when you described the question/answer portion - SO TRUE!!

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    1. It was even weirder when I did it with the grade schoolers. They would raise their hand to answer a question, and when I called on them, they would say, "I don't know." So why did you raise your hand???

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  5. SO. FUNNY. The picture of this in my mind was hysterical.....

    "I had this brilliant idea to bring in a pile of rubber gloves for the kids, so they could each put on a glove and feel like a doctor. Except this turned out to be the worst idea of all time. Kids are apparently unable to put on gloves on their own. Several teachers had to be recruited to help. This ate up, like, ten minutes."

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