I'm a Internist and a Nephrologist (in my country, first you must go through Internal Medicine Residency and then through Nephrology Residency to finally become a Nephrologist). And since I enjoy getting my hands dirty, I work more-than-sporadically as an ICU resident. I'm also the proud mother of a 4 1/2 month old.
One of the things I love about ICU is protocols (and of course the possibility of breaking them as needed) and the support you get from other areas of medicine. For instance, having gone through Internal Medicine and Nephrology residency, I find myself quite comfortable with vascular access. If by any chance I fail at establishing one the old fashioned way, I always have my faithful portable ultrasound by my side. If that doesn´t work, well, I can beep the anesthesiologist on call, not without being absolutely embarrassed, but hey, the job has to be done. And if the anesthesiologist has a rough time placing the catheter (which I secretly hope, that way I feel less like a failure) or if he misses too (which of course I do NOT hope for), the vascular surgeon will do.
But now, I find myself with a four month old low weight infant. I went through a C-section due to IUGR and Preeclampsia and babyboy was born weighing 4 pounds. He has recovered quite well but still is below average. And he only dreamfeeds! When he is awake, he is so distracted by the world around him he will only feed 1 or 2 ounces at a time. No matter what I do, I can be standing on my head, singing, waving all his toys in front of him, or feeding him in a dark quiet room, nothing works. Needless to say, he rejected my breast almost a month ago. And when he dreamfeeds he always eats less than he should. Also eating so little by day, even If I give him a last 23:30 bottle, he still wakes up several times at night. The good nights at 4 am and 6 am, so we start the day at 6 am. The bad nights.... well at 2, 4, 5 or 6 am...
I´m the kind of person who always believed that you could accomplish anything if resourceful enough, but this little person, my little "bundle of joy" has my whole world upside down
How do I do it? How do I "get the job done"? How do I get him to be hungry enough to finish the bottle, to sleep more than two hours a night without waking? Who do I call, who do I ask for support, ..... who do I beep?
And the answer is no one; in this one I´m alone by myself (my dear hubby helps a lot, but let's face it, he has less patience than I do). And that is probably why, and hopefully why, I´ll end up being a better mother than a central-venous-catheter-placer